I FEEL

 I FEEL..
lost.
trembeling with questions.
in awe of how much is going on.
amazed by this rollercoaster ride.

i feel
friendship. 
ending.
and new beginnings.
i feel i'm turning the pages of life
so fast now...
as if..
i have to read more than one chapter
or more than one book
at once
and you know,
not all the characters are keeping up.

I feel...
this burning inside me
has turned me into a rocket
and i am speeding up
but...
there's nothing to hold on to.
It's breath taking and exciting
and sometimes i get dizzy and nausea
shot into the open space
like that...

i feel i have
no safety net beneath,
no safety belt on,
just no safety at all 
at times.

and yet, i am supported
by some mysterious presence
pushing me to move forward,
making my heart feel watched lovingly
in this crazy ride.

I FEEL.


i feel...
i want YOU.
HERE.
by my side.
holding my hand through it all.
never letting me go.
i feel..such a longing
to be me
fully me
and yet to be yours
to belong
to someone and something
that would make me feel home...
and wanted
and loved
with all that i am.

it's...like...
i am flying higher and higher
catching the wind under my wings
pushing through clouds,
hair loose,
skin burnt by the sun
on my way to the light..
and..

i think i am tired
just a little bit tired
of flying on my own..

i feel the need 
to touch 
solid ground with my feet
so that i can push again up,
i wanna show TO YOU the stars
and the Earth 
from up above.


Do you want to come with me?


i feel the need to have a friend
prepaired for such a breath-taking ride

and the need to have a Home
to return to
everytime.

Anima